Professional writer for Uproxx.com, GammaSquad.com, Guyspeak.com, Guyism.com, Zug.com, and innumerable other sites. He writes the Internet, basically.
Dan Seitz
![10 Awesomely Spooky Amateur Haunted Houses [VIDEOS]](http://townsquare.media/site/341/files/2011/10/haunted-houses.jpg?w=980&q=75)
10 Awesomely Spooky Amateur Haunted Houses [VIDEOS]
Halloween is coming up, and we all know what that means: Christmas stuff starts showing up in stores any minute now. Also, on Halloween weekend, we'll be going to lots of haunted houses, haunted garages, haunted mazes, haunted cul-de-sacs and haunted, well, anything you can stick a light-up ghost on...

20 Reasons to Love ‘Mythbusters’ in Explosive GIF Form
Jamie Hyneman and Adam Savage, aka the 'Mythbusters,' returned last week with an episode that finally put the JATO rocket car myth to bed. It's the culmination of 200 episodes of blowing things up, burning things down and generally showing the fun side of ridiculous scientific experiments.

BOOM! 5 Exploding Animals Bombs Throughout History
No no, this is an animal photobomb, not a a regular animal bomb. It's still one of the best things that we've ever seen, but it's not what we came here to talk about.

Meet The Politest Cat On The Internet
Cats have a reputation for being rude and mean, and in some cases it's not entirely undeserved. In other cases, though, there are cats who demonstrate just the opposite. Like this one, who politely taps a human on the arm, and keeps it up until he gets some scratches...

Obscure Relative Leaves Woman $7.4 Million In Gold Hidden In His Garage
Arlene Magdon never met Walter Samasko, Jr. They were first cousins, but they may have never even met. Nonetheless, Arlene is thankful to Walter, because he left her a fortune in gold.

Batman Would Be A Crippled Wreck, According To Science
Batman is a master warrior and all around tough guy, so he's easily able to handle the stress of his lifestyle, right?
Wrong, according to science.

Classic Albums… With Power Rangers!
Believe it or not, the Power Rangers are still on the air, and lately they've been turning to viral videos to promote themselves.
Like this one, where they reenact twenty-one different album covers, ranging from Justin Bieber to The Clash, each with their own Power Rangers-esque twist...

Google ‘Dying Grandparent’ On Google Images And You Get… Christina Aguilera?!
Christina Aguilera has fallen victim to an exceptionally strange search engine quirk: If you Google 'dying grandparent' in Google Images, it's predominantly images of her, and she's neither a grandparent nor dying.
So what's going on?

Soon Your Smartphone Will Know Your Mood
Imagine a world where your smartphone can realize that you're angry or sad, and react accordingly. Thanks to the University of Rochester, it's not as far away as you might think.

Drug Courier Loses $20,000, Asks Tucson Police For Excuse Note
Granted, losing $20,000 of a drug cartel's money is fairly panic inducing. That said, you do have to wonder what Demarco Alonzo Thomas was thinking when he called the police for a note excusing him from delivering $20,000.

Seth MacFarlane To Woo Marge On The Simpsons
It's an old joke that there's one half-hour on Sunday Seth McFarlane hasn't been on. And now that he's going to be on The Simpsons, it's officially an inaccurate joke.

Bazooka Joe Getting The Boot From His Gum
After almost sixty years, Bazooka Joe is being put out to pasture: The bubble gum will no longer feature the little comic strips that pretty much defined the brand.

This Was Not The NFL’s Best Thanksgiving
This Thanksgiving was kind of a disaster for pro football fans. Fans of the Jets could only watch in horror as their beloved team gave up three touchdowns in about a minute of game time.
On the other hand, at least it wasn't the Lions/Texans game, where infamous quarterback Ndamukong Suh, who last year allegedly stomped on a Green Bay Packers player, went one better and kicked the Houston Texans'

Pranksters Dress As Target Employees On Black Friday
Black Friday is infamous among retail personnel for bringing out the absolute worst in people. Customers are rude, self-centered, and obnoxious. So the guys at Prank Vs. Prank struck back for the employee, dressing up as employees of a certain retail establishment and offering "help"...

Naked Man Rides London Statue For Three Hours
As Randy Newman warned us years ago, you should beware of the naked man. In London, they should beware of THIS naked man, who decided to ride a statue in the London chill.

Hang On, Sloopy The Chihuahua, You’ll Get That Food Eventually
Thanksgiving is a wonderful holiday for dogs. Lots of human food, lots of stuffed, sleepy people, and lots of attention. But sometimes you have to work to get your treat, and Sloopy the Chihuahua is no exception. But you have to admit, as attention hunting goes, this is pretty great...